Sunday is coming to an end. In between my watery meals and sleep, JT on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon & SNL and Ellen kept me company. Would have watched RM136 but I don't have the energy for 1 hour of the show. This pretty much sums up my weekend. What weekend?

This weekend is by far the most horrible, most loneliest weekend ever; when I pinned my hopes, my expectations to a donkey's tail when I couldn't even see where the tail is. 

I have to come to terms with certain things. It's high time I do so. 

And I also have to write more, like every time I breathe, I write. Not like this though. My thoughts are incoherent. 

I also have to love myself more. Not in a narcissistic way, in a more empowering way, before I can let love in. 

I have to let go. 

It's going to be a year or so of changes that I'm struggling with every atom of me to accept, simply because I cannot come to terms with it.

Once again, I have to let go. 


Tomorrow I'm going to see the doctor and get an MC and get my yu pian tang which I've been craving for since Friday with sqq yay ;)

lonely |ˈlōnlē|

ADJECTIVE sad because one has no friends or company :